Psychotherapy Retreats For Relationships

I have partnered with Arkadius Kyllendahl to provide therapy retreats for couples in the London and Surrey area. While I also provide couple therapy in hourly sessions, it is often much more challenging to get two people in a relationship in a room at the same time every week than it is over an intensive weekend.

If you are someone who prefers to work fast and deal with their issues as soon as possible, this brief therapy approach might work better for you. Therapy can be a time-consuming process when undertaken on weekly-hourly basis. It’s not for everyone, specially if there are childcare demands, and other life-style issues.

We provide weekend retreats that focus on both individuals and the relationship over an intensified period.

We have found that a customised and intensive approach to treatment for individuals and couples is the quickest route to finding solutions and fixing their problems. We have experienced our own transformation process as a couple, and we deeply understand what it takes to keep and maintain a thriving relationship. This is why we believe our psychotherapy retreats will work for you.

We have trained in multiple therapeutic models, and we have a vast experience in delivering psychotherapy for individuals, couples and groups.

We are passionate about transformation, personal growth of our clients, and supporting people to bring their lives back into balance. 

A tailored retreat includes:

  • An initial session via Skype to create a comprehensive assessment and formulation of your issues, so we know what we are working with, and to establish the most efficient approach to addressing the problem 
  • Customised retreat with one-to-one and joint couple therapy sessions
  • A post-retreat plan of action so you can both maintain the healthy change you have achieved and avoid setbacks
  • A follow-up contact to answer any of your further questions, once you have returned back to your day-to-day life
  • Discounted future therapy retreats with us

FOR MORE INFORMATION, VISIT:

About Us

Our Therapeutic Approaches

We integrate a plefora of different approaches, tools and therapies.

From a tried and trusted CBT model, to more innovative, cutting edge energy techniques. We are trained in Process-orientated Psychotherapy, CBT, Hypnotherapy, Gestalt therapy, Transactional Analysis, Psychosynthesis, Homeopathy, Shamanism, Facilitation & Conflict Dynamics, Astrology, Body & Somatic Experiencing, Kundalini Chakra Work, Hypnobirthing and Qi gong – and several others.

We typically combine different techniques and tools throughout the retreat. If however, you are interested in one particular approach or tool only, then we can discuss how we might work with you under that approach. Otherwise after your assessment we will give you a clear idea, structure and plan of what your personalised retreat will look like. You are now one step away from an effective solution to your problems.

Our Process Produces Results

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FIRST CONTACT

The first contact is via email or phone. Get in touch with us to discuss the nature of your issues and clarify all your questions and queries. After our initial discussion with you over email or phone, and with your go ahead we move on to schedule an assessment session, at which point you are required to pay an initial 20% of the overall agreed fee.

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ASSESSMENT

The main purpose of the assessment is establish what your therapeutic needs, arrive at an understanding of your problem and the guide treatment. The assessment is built around your needs so we can design a retreat that results in a positive therapeutic outcome. To assess your needs we will gather information from you about your past and current contributory factors to the issues you are experiencing. The assessment process is based upon the initial contact and the assessment that you feel comfortable with us using.

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RETREAT

After the assessment we go away and design your personalised retreat. This is done in conjunction with you, so it’s a two way process to ensure that we take into consideration all your preferences. We work fast, and once we have designed your retreat, and we have agreed the date, time and venue, we are all set to go ahead. The final stage of payment is required before the retreat begins.

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OUTCOMES

The outcomes, positive and desired changes are then communicated to you in a form of a document in order for you to maintain the change that you have achieved. Here we will provide you with some tools and suggestions so you can maintain the positive change in your everyday life. We schedule a face-to-face, or a Skype session between 3-4 weeks after the retreat to follow-up and provide you with further guidance to ensure that your problems are addressed successfully.

The Therapies we incorporate

SPIRITUALITY

spirituality - PSYCHOTHERAPY RETREATS

Deep spiritual attitudes and beliefs manifest in everyday life and of course therapy. These deep spiritual attitudes should ideally permeate and shape all therapist’s interventions, approaches and tools.

Behind our therapy methods and interventions, and behind your own day-to-day interactions, lie feeling attitudes. These are called these metaskills, and it is these feeling attitudes and approaches to life that strongly impact my life’s work.

When we have an awareness of feeling skills we can transform our life into a spiritual experience. Bringing metaskills to all that we do adds a quality of feeling. We are not aware of how we all go through life ‘doing’ missing out on the feeling. We are not present to ourselves or others and we are treating life as a to-do-list.

Metaskills are not what we have learned, it’s not the know-how or skills we have gathered through life, it is how we practice our skills in life. We still need continue to learn and grow with knowledge and skills, but how we interact with ourself and others is where metaskills reside.

It is through feelings and the atmosphere they create that our spiritual values about life spring to life. While they are not named, they are always there influencing our interaction and techniques.

While some techniques stress behavioural change and insight, it is the feeling that we bring to life that is at the core of life.

So you know what we are talking about, lets name some metaskills – compassion, humour, playfulness, curiosity and detachment. When we can foster these metaskills in our life, we are supporting the deep spiritual values that we hold.

Forgiveness, while not exactly a metaskill, it is a deep spiritual value that can permeate our life. When we can bring the value of forgiveness into our relationship with ourself and others, there’s a lot that can change. It’s not easy, but forgiveness is a work in progress for everyone.

Our continual work is to seamlessly weave in these metaskills, model them, live them and talk about them, so you can begin to see how when living from a place that appreciates the spirituality in us, supports your life and relationships at the core foundation.

PROCESS-ORIENTED HYPNOTHERAPY

PROCESS ORIENTED Hypnotherapy

Most of us are aware of how hypnosis can support changing addictive or unhelpful behaviours through making suggestions to the mind in altered states of consciousness, where the mind is more open to repatterning.

This is the main type of hypnosis that most hypnotherapists work with – one which is known as suggestive hypnosis to induce a trance and implanting thoughts into the subconscious mind that are triggered under certain conditions. In suggestive hypnosis, a clear goal is required as the suggestion is designed to support the goal.

The second kind of hypnosis is called process-oriented hypnosis.  This is where the conscious and subconscious mind join forces to work together as a unified whole.  The therapist and client also form a functional unity that encourages the healing process. In process-oriented hypnosis, there is an underlying faith in what Carl Jung called the ‘urge toward wholeness’.

Our entire approach is founded upon a belief in this collective urge towards unity or wholeness within ourselves. What this essentially means is that energy within the subconscious mind, even destructive energies, are always urging us, even in their challenging ways, towards our ultimate healing or reunification with our wholeness.

What Is Wholeness?

Wholeness or unification is the idea that we have a fundamental nature that is pure unconditional love at it’s centre, that embraces all polarities and all diversity as part of ourselves, rather than separate, disconnected or ‘other’ to us.

The Difference Between Suggestive Hypnosis & Process-Oriented Hypnosis

For instance, with suggested hypnosis and permission of the client, the therapist will implant a suggestion to not smoke, for example that cigarettes taste bitter. Or there may be a substitute suggestion where the impulse to smoke is replaced by the impulse to take some deep breaths.

Sometimes these suggestions can stick. Sometimes, these suggestions hold for a few months after which the root cause of the addiction in the first place reemerges, sometimes stronger. The outcome varies and depends upon the readiness of the client to change. Often though if the deeper issues are not dealt with then the addiction returns.

What suggestive hypnosis fails to respect or reverence is that even addictions that can be self-sabotaging and destructive are, at some level, there to serve us and take us towards our wholeness and healing. Often an addiction can hold an important new pattern that needs more support. For example, a very simple example is that a person with an addiction to alcohol might need to learn to bring the confident, ‘free’ state experienced under the influence of alcohol into everyday life (without the substance).

Recognising The Importance & Value Of Addictions

If we fail to recognise the important role that addictions, and other things we want to eliminate, play, then we fail to give reverence to the parts of our identity that also need the addiction. We all know that to go cold turkey can be a very debilitating experience that only works for some. In our culture, it’s over emphasised as the cure.

Our approach, while recognising the need for cold turkey under certain circumstances, also embraces the need for a gentler, more compassionate, inclusive approach that allows for a deeper understanding of certain destructive patterns. There’s a powerful little exercise called ‘Feeding Your Demons’ which beautifully illustrates the power of witnessing, listening and feeding our demons with what they need deep down. This doesn’t make them bigger and more aggressive, it makes them smaller and more compliant.

At heart, this is our approach – to use tools that actually work for you in the long term, rather than give you short fixes, that don’t always work. Process-oriented hypnotherapy has a long term objective of integration and wholeness, which ultimately means addressing the underlying meaning behind the experience. Through doing this, we come back to our wholeness which ultimately brings deeper sense of freedom.

Process-oriented hypnotherapy is open ended about short term goals.  Perhaps your presenting issue is to quit smoking, but underlying that there might be something much more important to address first to get achieve the desired goal. Remember that the urge towards wholeness is taking the form of a habit, it’s something to meet and understand, not eliminate.

When the urge towards wholeness fluidly functions within a client, then “free association”, where thoughts and emotions are allowed to flow freely within, will naturally move the client toward their own resolution (Freud’s main aspect of psychoanalysis), This can effectively resolve many addictions and destructive patterns of thinking, feeling or behaving.

How Freudian Slips & Mistakes Help Us

We go a few steps further and allow spontaneous imagery, movements and sounds to surface. We work with more channels of experience. This is not currently used in traditional hypnotherapy, but it is understood in NLP. Our form of hypnotherapy takes into consideration the whole being and body – we are not just a visual channel, we need to hear, move, make sounds, feel to really change our old patterns and create new healthy ones.

We work with spontaneous visualisations, but it goes further by working with the whole being. The process-oriented approach orients us into the present moment, where there is a direct and spontaneous feedback loop – where we can experience the universal flirts and synchronicities that connect us back into the web of universal life.

Even “Freudian slips,” or the unintended mistakes, or the accidental, are messages from this web of life. These are points when our secondary identity, the part of us that wants to be more lived that always holds these positive new patterns, (but which we usually have reservations about living) slips beyond our usual defenses and limiting beliefs to make itself known. It often does this uncomfortably in its initial stages – i.e. we have a reaction to it.

Our apparent mistakes actually reveal how we actually think and feel, or what we deeply yearn to become more of – whether it’s a powerful woman rather than competent woman, or a man capable of feeling vulnerability, rather than just capable of projecting strength.  These new parts of our identity, that are not integrated or fully lived yet, are closer to our deepest nature. When we are closer to our deepest nature, we are happier.

From the vantage point of process-oriented hypnotherapy, all symptoms including accidents, are striving to move us towards more wholeness and happiness. Deep down our inner being is bringing us events and circumstances in our lives to support more wholeness, even though unprocessed, these experiences feel painful and unnecessary.

Process-Oriented Hypnotherapy & Buddhism

Process oriented hypnosis is a form of meditation rooted in Buddhist Psychology, in both the early Adhidharma form and the Tantric Shamanic form. From a Buddhist viewpoint, difficult events, experiences, symptoms and relationships are known as ‘samskaras’ – which are essentially ripening into karmic experiences where we rebalance energy, bring it back into harmony. While often psychotherapy and meditation are often considered different paths, they can work to deepen the meditation process.

In the teaching of the twelve interconnected causes of sorrow, the Buddha clearly shows how all karmas are related to samskaras (emotionally charged thought impressions that have the potential to react to specific environmental stimuli and when activated become an impulse to do something) that exist in our subconscious mind (the storehouse of consciousness).

The Buddha believed in a universe where all consciousness, thoughts, emotions, sensations, bodies, and matter were constantly interacting with each other to form all the events of our lives. This is something that is now being corroborated by new physics and particularly quantum mechanics.

This urge towards wholeness organises our energy field and the entire universe. This is why we attract experiences that help us realise who and what we are and if processed take us into new parts of ourselves. Part of what drives karma and rebirth, whether you have a belief in that or not, is the innate compassion within our own being, which wants to realise itself. It is a somewhat forgotten axiom of life that love begets love. We can grow in our love and compassion through our suffering. Of course, life shouldn’t only be about suffering, the aim is get to a place where you experience life without suffering.

Joining The Client With Awareness

After working with many altered trance states, we have discovered it’s more effective to ‘join’ the client, to be in the state with them, with our deepened awareness, so to better unfold and more accurately follow the client process. This supports the client to not eliminate addictions, destructive patterns, but to develop an inner facilitator, guide, witness or awareness to change patterns from a deeper orientation.

Process-oriented hypnotherapy allows both client and therapist to work together, the client is not just the receiver and the therapist the giver – there is instead a mutually supportive relationship.  The therapist is surrendered to the client’s urge towards wholeness and supports this energy by following the process as it emerges in the moment.

Our approach understands that there is a ‘right’ timing with the process of change that is beyond us, something we can’t always know. We must honour and surrender to this also, and that when we are in service to the process at large and larger wholeness that’s emerging, we actually align ‘with life’ and this always gets the very best results for our clients.

What matters most is the magical discovery that happens within the natural learning process of the client. When awareness and learning is garnered through process-oriented hypnotherapy, much more than just an addiction is healed. The whole being is supported to change which brings a greater, more profound transformation.

We tend to use suggestive formal hypnotherapy sparingly, but process-oriented hypnotherapy regularly in our retreats.

COGNITIVE BEHAVIOURAL THERAPY

Cognitive Behaviour Therapy - PSYCHOTHERAPY RETREATSCognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is the most widely used and evidence-based treatment for a variety of psychological difficulties. CBT acknowledges the links between our thoughts, our behaviour and our moods. The research in CBT has shown a 50% success rate in treating anxiety and depression. which is higher than other talking therapies and more effective than medication alone when treating anxiety and depression.

Instead of focussing on looking for the unconscious meanings behind behaviour (psychoanalytic approach), CBT is a structured, action-oriented and problem solving approach.  It has been designed to help people manage their thoughts, behaviour and mood more effectively. We assist my clients in finding and practising effective strategies to address identified goals and decrease symptoms of their mental health problems.

Depending on the nature of the problem, the therapy process can be brief, and direct, driven by only  a few specific techniques, or more long term and complex. In simple cases of anxiety or depression patients will meet with me on a weekly basis for a period of roughly 6 – 15 sessions. The therapy follows a structured process. I usually suggest putting what has been learned in sessions into practice between sessions- a form of homework exercises. and behavioural experiments. CBT can be applied in individual, couples and group settings, and the techniques are often adapted for self-help applications. 

In CBT sessions we focus on current individual problems and interpersonal difficulties, and we help to develop healthy personal coping strategies.

Cognitive aspect

We help clients to become more aware of their unhelpful and dysfunctional thinking processes, and their impact on the emergence of maladaptive behaviours beliefs, attitudes, and negative emotions. We might challenge and modify negative cognitions and behaviour, and this process leads to significant improvements in mood. Oftentimes, we use a style of questioning , sometimes referred to as guided discovery, to help people become more aware of how they reason with themselves and other people. This process stimulates alternative viewpoints and ideas.

Behavioural aspect

In sessions we test new ways of perceiving and acting in order to help clients to appreciate the impact of their behaviour on their state of mind. We help clients to observe changes in their behaviour when they feel distressed. It is typical that responses , such as, reduced activity, unhealthy behaviours, or avoidance can keep or even worsen the problem. In sessions we help clients to acquire new ways of responding to their psychological distress, in order to help they to get out from their vicious circle and gain more control over their symptoms.

Further in our work we target the underlying negative belief patterns which give rise to the dysfunctional thinking and behaviours. Addressing and adjusting these deeply rooted thinking (schemas), leads to permanent improvement in the overall psychological functioning and the sense of wellbeing of clients.

ASTROLOGY

Astrology - PSYCHOTHERAPY RETREATS

We combine Astrology, which focuses on the time, date and place of birth with the Soul Plan system, which is your full birth name’s equivalent to an astrological reading. At the very moment you were born and in your original birth name your limitless potential was encoded.

Knowing this encoded information, known as your energetic soul blueprint works to unlock your fullest potential. Knowledge is power. Knowledge with understanding helps explain why we magnetise certain experiences and shows us how to resolve blocks. We can decode your Soul Purpose, giving you a renewed sense of purpose, bring clarity and perhaps even illuminate a completely new direction.

Using astrology, the soul plan system, and other spiritual paths, we can elucidate the life lessons you have agreed at a soul level and this can be a very liberating experience. Lessons do not just entail ‘karma’ from other lifetimes, i.e. not a debt owed to one from another. It is better to see these as debts we owe to our Self, or better still, a balancing of the Divine Self. They are also there to serve us deeply, as the conflict and challenges experience allow us to grow in our awareness.

Encrypted in our birth names and astrology are latent gifts and talents. Uncovering these encoded meanings unlocks and opens us up to our infinite potential.

Most people have heard about Astrology, but not everyone have heard of the Soul Plan system. The Soul Plan gives a foundation of the energies you are working with in this lifetime. Your original birth name holds information on purpose, direction, goals, as well as challenges, talents, skills and potential. We use your astrological data to identify the strong themes and to give a more detailed information. If the Soul Plan energies are the dish ingredients, the astrology is the measure, amount and flavours to add.

Scenarios are planned by your higher Self, the Divine Mind aspect, otherwise known as soul contracts that you yourself have chosen as growth lessons to assist you in moving into greater wisdom.

ASTROLOGY

Breathwork AND REBIRTHING

Learning to use the breath as a tool for centring and checking in with our heart and gut is not only helpful in therapy, but when practiced in daily life, enables us to contact our own inner truth and set boundaries rooted in what feels right for us.

Shifting our attention from the contents of what we say to breath and body awareness enables individuals and couples to make the switch from cognitive exploration to one based on present-centred processing and phenomenological observation. The consistent use of breath awareness methods is especially useful in drawing the connections between inner dialogues, attitudes, emotions, sensations, and holding patterns in the body.

The breath acts as a bridge between the conscious and unconscious, between the mind and the body. You can control your breathing consciously by, for example, pranayama breathing exercises, but if you don’t think about your breathing for a whole day, you still are breathing.

Conscious breathing is usually done lying down but can happen anytime in any position. You learn to consciously connect your breath so that there are no pauses between the inhale and the exhale. The breathing is full and also as relaxed as possible, finding your own rhythm, probably slightly faster and fuller than you are used to.

Rebirthing

Rebirthing is a simple, gentle yet powerful conscious breathing technique. It brings into awareness not only our unconsciously held beliefs and emotions but also the relationships we have with our bodies, ourselves, our intimates and our world. When we consciously breathe with this awareness, we make it possible to resolve, integrate and heal previously unresolved issues within ourselves. This frees up energy, resolves trauma, bringing greater aliveness and joy and allowing us to move towards fulfillment of our potential as human beings.

Rebirthing works on the principle that there is a direct connection between mental and physical well being and the openness of the breathing. Relaxing and releasing the breath dissolves tension in both the body and the mind. Through intentional breathwork, breathing continuously without break, your body takes in more oxygen than usual, which changes the CO2 level in your brain.

Qi, prana and ki the chinese word for life force, is also regulated through breath. There’s a tremendous relationship between breathwork, the lungs, and grief. If we don’t allow ourselves to grieve, or keep suppressing grief, it comes out in other ways such as anxiety or panic attacks. Breathing exercises can help with panic attacks caused by suppressed grief.

You enter a self-induced trance state (a non-ordinary state of consciousness) where memories, pictures, emotions or body sensations can surface to be reviewed, released and integrated.

The power of rebirthing is that in this state you are the experiencer as well as the observer of past incidents that may emerge, enabling you to let go and reinterpret what happened in the past from a newly conscious and fresh perspective – this is why it is called rebirthing. Through conscious connected breathing you accumulate life force (prana, qi, ki) which starts to move freely through you body (experienced as tingling, energy rushes or waves).

This loosens up stored blockages held in your four-body energy system (physical, emotional, mental and spiritual), thus working on all four levels at the same time. Experiences may vary and the spectrum of experiences range from physical sensations of pain or pleasure, release of body blockages through heat or energy movement to release of emotions (sadness, anger, etc.) There may be realisations of dysfunctional thought patterns or new thought connections and insights, and deeply spiritual or energetic experiences.

Some doors only open from the inside and breath is a way of accessing that door. Breathwork also should come before meditation. Meditation is more advanced than breathwork. It’s always best to start with a simple breathwork.

TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS

Parent-Adult-Child

Transactional analysis (TA) is a widely recognised form of modern psychotherapy. It can be a long-term or a brief and solution-based approach. Sessions are designed to explore client’s personality and how this has been shaped by present experience and past experiences – those stemming from childhood.  Sessions can be conducted with individuals, couples or groups.

The therapist works collaboratively with the client, and typically utilises a variety of models, techniques and tools to analyse client’s social interactions. The therapist identifies what has gone wrong in client’s communication and provides opportunities for them to change repetitive patterns or ‘unconscious scripts’ that stem from childhood decisions and teachings and that limit their potential.

At the heart of TA is a theory that every person’s psyche is composed of three ego states: parent, adult and child. The therapy process leads to identifying client’s predominant ego states (parent-like, child-like, or adult-like) which helps them to understand their behaviour.

HOMEOPATHY

Homeopathy-psychotherapy retreats

Homeopathy is a holistic form of complementary treatment. It was founded in the late 1700s in German physician Samuel Hahnemann, and it has been widely practiced throughout Europe since. Homeopathy’s holistic nature means that it treats each person as unique individual. Instead of simply looking at the person’s physical symptoms, the body, mind, and emotions are all taken into consideration in treatment process. It is gentle and yet fast approach to the treatment of physical and mental health problems. 

As a method of treatment, homeopathy is recognised by the World Health Organisation as the second largest therapeutic system in use in the world. It is very well established in India and South America. Over thirty million people benefit from its use in Europe.

How does Homeopathy work?

Homeopathy makes use of substances that are normally found in nature, which are prepared into remedies in the process of serial dilution. Homeopathy uses very small doses of original  in order to avoid side effect of the original substances. In the process of dilution the chemical molecules of the original substance are slowly removed, and what is left is an energetic blueprint of the substance. In this way, rather then acting directly on the cells and tissues of the body, the remedy reacts with the energy of the person. This energetic process enables the body’s healing powers to be activated, and the disease to be eliminated.

The practice of homeopathy is based on the Law of “similars” – the principle that states that, in simple terms, what the substance can cause, it can cure. An example of this principle in operation can be a treatment of insomnia. We all know that coffee keeps people awake and alert. However, very small doses of coffee can help people presenting symptoms of insomnia and overly alert mind. 

How does Homeopathy view disease, and how is it different from classical medicine?

Hahnemann proposed that disease is a process that affects the patient’s whole organism, their body, thoughts and emotions.  He further suggested that medicines can be applied in small, non-toxic doses to treat the whole of the patient, and the disease, or separate symptoms only. Homeopathic remedies are taken on an intermittent basis, until the problem is resolved, and not indefinitely, as is often the case in medicine. 

Homeopathy is based on the premise that health is the harmony of vital processes, and disease begins with the disturbance of this harmony, beginning on the deepest level — the mental and emotional. As a system of healing, homeopathy can address acute cases, or help in acute and chronic conditions without causing any side effects. Medicine, on the other hand, address the symptoms only, and rarely questions their true origins. 

Are there side effects after homeopathic treatment?

Homeopathic medicines are safe to use, they are not toxic, and rarely cause side-effects. Providing that they are taken under the guidance of a homeopath, they can be taken by people of all ages, including babies, children and pregnant or breastfeeding women.

What to expect during the homeopathic appointment?

Homeopathic practitioners begin their work with an initial session that is devoted to creating the complete picture of your disease. As well as asking about your symptoms, a homeopathic practitioner will be interested in your lifestyle, eating habits and preferences, temperament, emotional states, personality, sleep patterns. They will gather all this information in order to form a complete picture of you. This picture will be matched to the symptoms of your illness, and on this basis a particular type and strength of homeopathic medicine will be prescribed.

At the end of your consultation your homeopathic practitioner will give you a prescription for a specific homeopathic remedy,  and will advise you how often to take the medicine. Homeopathic remedies are usually taken in tablets or pillules. They are, however, also available in liquid and powder form.

Your first appointment will take anything between one and two hours. The follow-up appointments typically last 30 minutes. This, however, does vary depending on the practitioner approach, and if they mix this with some other forms of treatment, i.e. psychotherapy.

GESTALT THERAPY

Gestalt-therapy

Gestalt Therapy is a school of psychotherapy developed by Fritz Perls. Gestalt therapy is an existential, humanistic therapy, founded on the principles of choice, responsibility (response ability), and meaningful living.

Rather than maintain a fixed pattern of dissatisfaction and longing, through Gestalt we can begin to experiment with new ways of doing things, expanding daily horizons. In a Gestalt therapy session clients are encouraged to bring more awareness to the present moment and the present context in their lives. During this process, and with the help of a variety of techniques (i.e. empty chair, internal dialogue), clients are discovering feelings that may have been suppressed or masked by other feelings. Further, the therapist helps clients to accept, trust, and express these emotions in a healthy and constructive way. Through this process, a person’s overall awareness increases and they gain a new sense of self.

Couples and relationship issues are increasingly prominent in my private practice. How are these issues addressed within therapy? The presence of a third party, the therapist, changes the dynamic of a couple. There is in the session a sense of a wish to change things and try something different, this alone is often what brings a couple into therapy. It is this dynamic that enables the therapist to bring to awareness aspects that together a couple may not be able to explore.

Issues such as trust are often to the fore of relationship issues. When trust has been betrayed, can it be re-established and how do we go about this? Trust is fundamental to human existence. We are constantly reminded about trusting this or trusting a fellow human. If we do not have trust then what happens to that relationship and to the individual who lacks the feeling of trust? Is a relationship without trust worthwhile? The relationship can then certainly be at a disadvantage and a distance is created.

Feelings of being able to trust come about when we feel confident and have self-esteem. It is then that it is possible to feel that if trust is betrayed by the other, it is not our fault. There is a deserving quality in all of us that can expect and respect trust from another. It is in these conditions that a relationship can flourish and grow. A couple who can relax together enjoy each other’s company and trust each other.

Can a relationship be repaired after a break in trust? Much will depend on the nature of the individuals involved. If the self-esteem and confidence has taken a blow then maybe this can be repaired over time and by looking at what exactly has been damaged. This can be achieved by a close look at the process of self-esteem and the needs that are present. However, there is much courage that is needed and an ability to let those feelings of trust rise once more. Feelings of guilt may also be around from either party. Inquiry into how these feelings arise and the influence they have in the relationship now need to be examined.

The ability to complete the healing that exists after wounding takes time, courage and commitment. It is likely that the relationship will change, to be relaxed within a relationship allows each individual to grow, become closer and intimate. The session in gestalt couples therapy focusses on the contact in the relationship. Blame and fault are not to the forefront, the ability to move forward and solve difficulties in the relationship is the primary process.

CONFLICT FACILITATION

conflict-resolution-facilitation

There are many different situations that might require faciliation and awareness of conflict dynamics. Whether it’s a difficult relationship at home or work, our work emphasis is on the moment-to-moment unfolding of a relationship.

This work is very different to other types of relationship work in that rather than emphasising decisions that need to be made such as separating or staying together, the focus is on what’s really there in the moment, in the relationship.

Marriage, divorce, and separation are important legal constructs, but they do not accurately reflect the emotional reality of a couple. When we follow and unfold the momentary flow and evolving dance that occurs in a relationship, we connect less with it as a battleground and more with it as a dance.

It might be relieving to hear that separation, divorce, and togetherness are momentary, fluid processes, rather than rigid stuck realities – in other words, we are constantly moving in and out of these potential realities inside our own heads. From this perspective, we may be very close one moment and quite separate the next. Sometimes these momentary states indicate that it actually is time to make a decision to be married or divorced or separated, but there is also flux and change even when these major decisions have been reached.

Another key idea is that relationships have both a practical, everyday part and also a dreaming, infinite aspect. From this perspective, relationships don’t ever end. Even if the daily relating decreases or disappears, an eternal part goes on in a changed form. Postulating an eternal part of relationships has the potential to change our whole perspective on couples separating.

How Is All This Important For Conflict Dynamics?

The idea that there is no absolute right or wrong if people separate, and the idea that relationships are not fixed but always changing, are two sides of the same coin. As we move away from imposing a model of what is right or wrong, we move to a perspective of following the evolution of a couple’s relationship.

Our conflict resolution approach is based upon placing more emphasis on the feeling-level connection between couples. Thus, legally married couples may at times feel blissfully together, but at other times may need long periods of separation or intense conflict. Heterosexual, homosexual, and bisexual couples who are not legally married also experience a range of relationship needs. In this fluid perspective, couples define themselves from moment to moment. Some couples may often feel close, others may fight constantly, and both types may consider themselves coupled (or not). In this view, the power of definition lies with the individuals rather than somewhere outside such as the state or church.

We focus upon the changes a person or couple goes through so we avoid the behaviorist tendency to recommend that he change and develop new personality traits or behavioral patterns. We side with change and with awareness of what is happening in any given moment to avoid programming a person to be whole and balanced. We do not suggest change as an outer solution, but support changes as they emerge from the your own or the couple’s process.

There are personal and collective shifts present in relationships. Roles present in relationships also need to shift. If both partners are not able to grow out of old roles to encounter newness in themselves then often relationship endings take place. Collective shifts around men and women issues are constantly being encountered in relationships.

As therapists, we understand the need to learn to speak of these cultural forces present–the force of tradition, the forces of sexism, homophobia, racism, the forces of mainstream thinking, the forces of liberation, freedom, and change. These collective winds blow through relationships and change them, and if they are not named, couples often feel victimised by their experiences.

 

If we approach the relationship flexibly, the part that no longer works may die, while the part with energy lives on. A couple might want to give up living together but keep their musical or physical relationship alive. In the old model, the entire relationship must end, except for certain legally prescribed forms such as parental rights. We can move beyond the all or nothing approach and we can support you to do that.

At a more esoteric level, these outer manifestations of an ongoing connection reflect the deeper dreaming process that continues after the formal end of a relationship. Relationships have an eternal side beyond ‘death’ in that they are guided by myths reflected in the early dreams and dreamlike experiences of the relationship.

For example, I remember a couple who said that their earliest relationship memory was that they were out to dinner, and the man tried to do a magic trick where he pulled the tablecloth out from under the dishes on the table. The magic only partially worked, and the dishes went all over the place and created a huge mess. These two main elements of magic and mess became two key elements that much of their relationship was organised around. The central difficulty of the couple was when there got to be too much mess and not enough magic, the woman would become disillusioned and they would have bring in more magic. When things got too orderly and not exciting enough, the man became disillusioned. This relationship was not just about two people, but about two different energy states, magic and order, interacting.

The first dream often holds the relationship myths – which are the central dreaming background to relationship. When certain myths are lived out, couples can move on from each other, or they may discover new myths to work on with each other. Some couples have myths that need to be worked on for their lifetimes. Having a myth that takes long-term work to fulfill brings up the eternal side of relationship connections. Eternal connections are not bound by convention, time, space, or marriage certificates.

Similarly, spiritual bonds are not made in the legal realm and can’t be cancelled in the legal realm. I have seen many couples who have done everything possible to destroy their connection, yet the connection still lives. This is not just codependency in which two people live off each other to form a whole. In contrast, deep spiritual connections are built on two beings who are individuals and also strongly connected.

It’s common in couples that one partner will threaten, “If you don’t do this, or if you ever do that, I will never have anything to do with you again.” Then the other partner has an affair, or makes a career change the first partner prohibited. Despite all the threats to end the relationship, the forbidden act, when processed, may lead to an even more powerful connection. Relationships that are meant to continue in some form can withstand all kinds of relationship dynamite.

This sort of endurance is not codependent, such as when an alcoholic and her partner support each other’s denial. In a spiritually rooted connection the couple has to work through all that happens. They do not support each other’s denial, but are instead intimately involved in helping each other wake up and become more aware.

Determining which parts of a relationship persist because of the spiritual power behind the guiding myth and which parts endure because of codependency is a difficult task. We help differentiate between these two possibilities by observing the ongoing dreams of the people in the relationship. For example, codependency will appear as a repetitive problem in both people’s dreaming. These kinds of dreams disturb one or both partners, irritating them into waking up.

In contrast, some relationships are dedicated to helping people become free of their personal and shared addictions, and these are very powerful connections. If a relationship like this is interrupted on the daily physical plane, through separation, divorce, or death, it will continue in dreaming. Even death doesn’t stop an eternal connection. After the death of a partner or parent we can continue to experience enormous positive shifts in the relationship.

Some relationships have no honeymoon period. From the first moment together they were working on deep issues. Such relationships not only focus on interpersonal issues, but the issues constantly challenge both people to develop their whole selves. Such couples will often say, “Why am I with so and so when they push every button I have?”.

Often from the outside these relationships appear to be filled with conflict and suffering, and external observers are often frightened by or disapproving of the intensity present. The relationship may go through many periods of death and renewal, and may need frequent outside help. People who have this as their relationship myth seem to have little choice–they either work with their connection willingly or the relationship difficulties become so great they are forced to do the necessary personal growth and relationship work that is being asked of them.

Another side of recognising the eternal aspect of relating involves accepting death and change. Buddhist teachers often say that the first lesson of Buddhism is the wisdom of impermanence. Everything changes, and our attachment to holding on to the way things are is a major cause of our suffering. Relationships are constant teachers of this principle. Couple’s often talk about how they suffer when their relationship changes, since they were sure that this relationship would last forever in its current form. People are angry at their partner, God, and everyone else when a relationship changes.

Our work is to help people work with their attachment, get to know their detachment, and stay in touch with the eternal spiritual background of their relationships that will continue no matter how the form changes. Relationships that welcome death as part of the process also allow for rebirth. As the old parts of the process and old structures die, the potential for the new grows.We must not avoid death states since they often hold the potential for something new and exciting to regenerate the relationship.

We can help bring awareness of both the impermanent and eternal aspects of relationship. Relationships that lack the fluidity to accept change can die of stagnation. Many couples cannot let go and embrace change without a deep personal sense of the eternal and of spiritual life.

Spiritual traditions sometimes refer to death as the great awakening. Major relationship transformations, including divorce and separation, may also provide an opportunity for great awakenings. Such changes have the potential to awaken people to their own nature, the nature of relationship and the nature of life.

These ideas on the eternal nature of relationship are not meant to replace the importance of knowing when and how to end a relationship. When relationships become physically, psychologically, or spiritually destructive, it is time for them to transform or move on. When relationships are destructive, the daily connection often needs to be broken, while something in the dreaming world will continue.

In situations where a relationship is no longer working, we look for signs that both partners are willing to work with and transform the situation. Often, one or both partners are finished but can’t let go. Letting go then becomes the teaching. The couple’s job is to learn the importance of letting go. When couples can let go, the pain is often great, and so is the relief.

Relationship addiction can also prevent people who need to separate from letting go. People stay together, even in damaging relationships, because they are addicted to each other. We are defining addictive relationship as the kind of relationship (or phase in a relationship) in which there is a large gap between the dream one person has of their partner and the reality of the partner. In addition, an addictive relationship is physically, psychologically, or spiritually harmful.

In addictive relationships usually one or both people gives their partner enough of something to keep them hooked, but not enough to satisfy. This partial satisfaction is very powerful. If someone meets almost none of your needs, it is easy to let go, and if a partner truly meets your needs, there is no reason to let go. However, someone who meets your needs in flashes or moments, or almost meets your needs, or plays with meeting your needs, offers a powerful hook.

At some point, the pain of the frustration becomes so great that it hurts one or both people. It is our job at this point to point out that what is happening is not love but addiction, and challenge the couple to break the addiction. Addiction looks like love, but it is a cheap imitation. People often don’t realise this until they enter a truly loving relationship. We might need to provide information and support in the transition until there’s a realisation of how incomplete and dissatisfying the addictive relationship is.

Addictive relationships, like any addiction, can be difficult to transform. We can bring awareness of the addictive pattern and support with continually confronting the addiction. It is easy for the couple to slip back into the old groove, but there is a moment when an addiction must be faced and broken. Outer signs of when it is time to break the addiction include when one or both partners develops physical symptoms related to the relationship; develops substance addictions; becomes depressed or anxious, or has other psychologically difficult states that become an ongoing pattern. At such times, it is important to check in with a person’s deepest feelings in order to discover a direction.

Our role as therapists is to help couples and families have the courage and awareness to follow the relationship whether the river is calm or full of rapids, whether the relationship is beginning, continuing, transforming, or ending. The emphasis is not on just reaching the end point, but on appreciating and learning from all points on the journey. As therapists, we are aware of the societal pressures couples and families face. Despite these pressures, people will be drawn to follow their own natures, and our job is to support them in this important task.

We can help you create a new relationship model that helps both individuals feel connected to the vitality within the relationship, not only at the exciting beginnings, but throughout the relationship, including at times of transition and ending.

Relationships are challenging. Creating, maintaining and sustaining a successful relationship can be hard work even at the best of times. If you don’t have the skills, you have no time because of work commitments or children then working through everyday problems that arise in relationship can get put to the side and over time this builds resentment and deeper issues.

Every relationship needs care and attention to be effective & safe. Taking care of your relationship means learning about the nature of your relationship and knowing key tools for communication and trouble shooting.

When two people have the will to go deeper with one another, not only confronting their pain, but actively participating in their pleasure, anything feels impossible. The whole is truly more than the sum of its parts

A balance of power enables a long-term, intimate relationship to flourish. But though two people in a couple need to be equal in everything, they are not necessarily equal at everything. A truly nurturing intimacy has the capacity to help each individual heal from the pain of the past, and to empower each one of them, in the present, to reach for their dreams.

Our Couple’s Intensive is a powerful retreat, which will offer tools, deep work and most importantly precious time to revitalise or save your relationship.

SHAMANISM

Shamanism

Shamanism combines ancient and modern wisdom teachings to support people to journey into everyday and non-ordinary reality for personal growth and healing of self and the wider community.

While traditional psychiatry attempts to convince people that altered and extreme states of reality and the existence of other realms are not real, shamanism focuses on working with them, accessing them without getting lost.

Another key aspect to working with shamanic callings is what shamans call soul retrieval or marginalised parts of ourselves. This focuses on childhood and other times of major life wounds. Soul loss is the effect of trauma, noting that whenever we experience trauma, we react by splitting off a part of our vital essence. Shamanic systems believe that the split-off essence goes into non-ordinary reality where it can be retrieved through the shamanic journeying. 

Shamans worldwide have associated illness with this loss of soul and vital energy, and therefore, soul retrieval offers a spiritually based path of healing. Retrieving lost parts split-off is a process involving both therapist and client together. Parts can need direct retrieval which is an active rather than passive client process and in terms of marginalised parts of ourselves, we may engage in role-playing, expressive and sentient work, and other methods of reintegrating and embodying the effects of split off or marginalised parts.

PROCESS-ORIENTED PSYCHOTHERAPY

process-oriented-psychology

Process-oriented psychology, otherwise known as process work, was developed by Dr. Arnold Mindell and his colleagues in Zurich. It is an innovative and comprehensive psychotherapeutic modality designed for working with the entire spectrum of human consciousness. It has several roots including Family dynamics, Jungian Psychology, Gestalt and modern physics and Taoism. It integrates dreamwork, bodywork, relationship work, meditation, and large group work into a single theoretical framework.

Like Gestalt, it is focused on phenomenology – a method of exploring the truth of one’s present moment—what one can know right now—through observation of the phenomena of experience; for example, sensation, activation, thought, imagery and movement.

A core feature of phenomenological observation is to describe rather than explain what is encountered – articulate inner observations, as opposed to relying on old theories as to why things are the way they are. By developing a phenomenological awareness of what occurs inside the body during the therapy session, clients can develop a clear sense of the deeper emotions.

SEX THERAPY

sex-therapy-psychotherapy-retreats

Phenomenology is a method of exploring the truth of the present moment—what one can know right now—through observation of the phenomena of experience; for example, sensation, activation, thought, imagery. A core feature of phenomenological observation is to describe rather than explain what is encountered.

The client is encouraged to articulate inner observations, as opposed to relying on old theories as to why things are the way they are. By developing a phenomenological awareness of what occurs inside the body during the therapy session, clients can develop a clear sense of the deeper emotions that impact their sexuality.

As we explore past sexual experiences and current encounters, bodily sensations are often accompanied by spontaneous imagery. Memories of early sexual feelings, possibly traumatic incidents, and their interpretations of those experiences, become more vivid and can be re-experienced in a new, more creative way.

Moreover, as clients learn to identify even subtle sensations of emotions such as fear, shame, or anger, they can transfer those skills to a sexual situation, recognising emotional and sexual resistance and the inner dialogues that go along with them. Taking a few moments to breathe and relax, to connect with their partners if that is what they desire, and to be more present in the moment.

1. Breath and Body Awareness. Focusing attention on breath and internal experience changes the pace and depth of the investigation. By shuttling between cognitive exploration and moment-by-moment processing, we can shift from a left-brain to a right-brain atmosphere. Breath work helps access and intensify emotions, sensations, and imagery. We make the distinction for clients between the need to release tension and reduce energy blocks versus the need to contain energy in order to sustain higher levels of positive arousal. This way of working supports individuals to reconnect with inner subjective truths and authentic pleasures.

2. Sexual Focus. We consider it essential to honour the sexual distress, and to give sound sex information when appropriate. The key is to reframe what may feel like a relational disaster into a positive learning opportunity. We distinguish between emotional, physical, and sexual intimacy, and how each augments a couple’s connection. We encourage breath and body awareness during physical and sexual contact, and in both solitary and partnered sexual experiences.

3. Relationship Focus. I always take a thorough family history and trace with clients the associations between present issues and the past, especially with respect to the continuing effects of parental deprivation or unresolved trauma. If the client is a couple, I encourage them to become a bodywork unit—helping to heal one another’s past wounds as well as enhance non-verbal communication skills.

4. Experimental Focus. Creative experiments within the therapy session and for homework are essential. Clients’ observations, irrespective of their ability to complete the experiment, become valuable resources for gaining insight and courage. One element is the “unit of work” which has to do with “constructing an experiment for the couple that has the potential to strengthen the undeveloped parts of the system.” Some of the most potent experiments can be those that aim to strengthen the physical bond, of which sexuality is one important part.

TRAUMA RECOVERY

Overcoming-trauma RECOVERY PSYCHOTHERAPY RETREATS

When we experience adverse situations, such as a traumatic event involving actual or threatened danger, we face incredible challenges. The initial stage following a traumatic event is often a time of silence. It’s common for recently victimised people to not talk about what happened – this can be down to shame, guilt, isolation, denial, confusion, social stigma or simply wanting to forget the experience. Trauma can create low self-esteem, force us to feel overwhelming and disconnected from others and our environment.

When we begin to emerge from the suffering and yearn for release, to let go and move on in our lives, our relationships or simply not be weighted down by the heaviness of the past memories and recall. At the stage, we are beginning to look for ways to move forward in our lives, although there is often still a tug-of-war taking place within the individual between a need to be safe and protect emotions and a need to grow and move beyond traumatic experiences.

Often for some people there is a process of working through victimisation, for others it’s self-blame or responsibility to the point of guilt and shame. Either way, working through these stages and fully understanding the tendency to fall back into to protect the self is important for healing.

Identifying the ways in which the experience has helped garner strengths supports a movement forward. This allows for a greater understanding and integration of the experience and its impact on life. Forgiveness can also be an important part of this step, although this should never be rushed. There are many feelings and emotions left behind during trauma, as well as intense emotional triggers and body symptoms.

For many, this entire process can take many years. For those with the readiness, there are quicker solutions. Each individual and trauma is different and must be approached as different and unique. The process of healing is not always linear. We can take one step forward and two steps back sometimes as we grapple to work with all the different elements.

Somatic Experiencing Approach

The Somatic Experiencing® method is a body-oriented approach to the healing of trauma and other stress disorders. It is the life’s work of Dr. Peter A. Levine, resulting from his multidisciplinary study of stress physiology, psychology, ethology, biology, neuroscience, indigenous healing practices, and medical biophysics. The SE approach releases traumatic shock, which is key to transforming PTSD and the wounds of emotional and early developmental attachment trauma.

The SE approach offers a framework to uncover whether and where someone is ‘stuck’ in the fight, flight or freeze responses and provides clinical tools to resolve these fixated physiological states.

The SE approach facilitates the completion of self-protective motor responses and the release of thwarted survival energy bound up in the body, addressing the root cause of trauma symptoms. This is approached by gently guiding clients to develop increasing tolerance for difficult bodily sensations and suppressed emotions.

SE is a clinical methodology based upon an appreciation of why animals in the wild are not traumatised by routine threats to their lives, while humans, on the other hand, are readily overwhelmed and often subject to the traumatic symptoms of hyperarousal, shutdown and dysregulation. SE supports the completion of trauma.

EMDR

Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing (EMDR) is a recognised therapy and an integrative psychotherapy approach that has been extensively researched and is a proven effective treatment of trauma. EMDR is a set of standardised protocols that incorporates elements from many different treatment approaches with the difference of working with the eye movements to help diminish the emotional charge of traumatic memories.

Sacred Fire

A particular powerful approach to healing memories and trauma, especially if you believe in the power of the imagination and visualisation to heal. But it does go one step further than that, as it’s through an invocation that it is received. Calling upon this sacred Divine fire called the Violet Flame brings it into our consciousness, which can then be visualised in the inner eye and felt in the body as a transmutation, cleansing, purifying energy. It’s a very versatile tool, which can be invoked into memories, into emotions to release the old, past stories and supports forgiveness work. It does the work, so you don’t need to, the more you surrender to the Violet Flame, the more it can do the work

TRANSACTIONAL ANALYSIS

Parent-Adult-Child

Transactional analysis (TA) is a widely recognised form of modern psychotherapy. It can be a long-term or a brief and solution-based approach. Sessions are designed to explore client’s personality and how this has been shaped by present experience and past experiences – those stemming from childhood.  Sessions can be conducted with individuals, couples or groups.

The therapist works collaboratively with the client, and typically utilises a variety of models, techniques and tools to analyse client’s social interactions. The therapist identifies what has gone wrong in client’s communication and provides opportunities for them to change repetitive patterns or ‘unconscious scripts’ that stem from childhood decisions and teachings and that limit their potential.

At the heart of TA is a theory that every person’s psyche is composed of three ego states: parent, adult and child. The therapy process leads to identifying client’s predominant ego states (parent-like, child-like, or adult-like) which helps them to understand their behaviour.

QI GONG & GROUNDING

Qi-gong GROUNDING PRACTISES

Many people across the world practice Tai chi and Qi gong everyday because of its proven health and fitness benefits.  These ancient chinese energy art forms work at a cellular level, unlocking deep trauma in your body slowly.  Realigning your spine and balancing out your left and right side – something fundamental to our healing and awakening.

Perhaps you’ve tried to learn yourself or you want to but know there are so many ways in you haven’t been sure which direction to take, especially since it can look quite traditional , complex and a long long journey before you can call yourself a Tai chi practitioner.  If you’ve tried Tai chi before you will remember how at first it feels so overwhelming remembering all the various moves and the transitions between them.

Tai chi and Qi gong are similar but different systems.  Tai chi is more complex and intricate – it takes time to learn the sequence of movements.  Qi gong is a simpler set of movements which clears your energy and meridian lines.  It is also the foundation of Tai chi. There are thousands of different forms of Qi gong.

With both art forms, we are working to bring in flow, balance and centring to our physical body and our physical movement.  We are encouraging a grace within the body, a grounding of our energy into our lower dantien (3 finger widths below the naval), and ultimately an opening of the heart, so it can be a bridge between the upper and lower chakras. As the saying goes “your legs become like mountains and your arms like clouds. Essentially, we are learning to connect heaven and earth, the masculine and feminine, within us. To unite heaven and earth.

Tai chi helps you gain a true appreciation of yin and yang, and the Taoist philosophy, that life is a process, ever flowing between these two moving states.  As we dance gracefully and perfect the moves, we are bringing into the body the universal principle of life always in a process of transition, even if it doesn’t appear that way. Life is just a series of many moments, even when we feel stuck and stagnant.

Tai chi and Qi gong will teach you how to deeply relax your body, invaluable when there is a lot of stress in your life, and with the lifestyles many of us have, stress is unavoidable unless we are working on bringing in the valuable yin energy, so missing in our western lives.  It does this through teaching you how to unwind all the tendons and muscles, freeing up your vital energy to flow to your organs, decluttering your mind. As you learn and move through the Tai chi form (and there are various different forms) you’re internally massaging the five vital organs which between them control all the functions of your body and mind. This means your joints become more supple and your muscles more resilient.

Tai Chi improves your cardiovascular, respiratory and lymphatic functions. The soft flowing movements gently benefit all your internal systems. With time, your balance and coordination improve and as you slowly detoxify and cleanse your body, you get less ill and stop getting the colds that everyone else around you pick up.  You become more immune and able to shake off illness and you’re better able to alleviate pain and illness quickly.

The outcome is rejuvenation of the mind and body, letting the spirit feel liberated and feeling more impervious to the stress and pressure of everyday life. You might have seen how Tai chi is popular with the older generation – perhaps this is because as we age a certain openness can enter into our lives. Tai chi is great for keeping us feeling and looking young.

The Team

We specialise in bespoke transformational retreats for relationships. 

Arkadius Kyllendahl is a Clinical Psychology graduate (BPS), and an accredited Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapist (BABCP). He has completed further training in Gestalt therapy and Process Oriented Psychology. He is a Mindfulness teacher and he has practised Mindfulness for almost two decades.

Ark’s fifteen years of experience as a psychotherapist have been gained in a wide variety of roles within both NHS and private settings, as well as for charities and in private practice.  He’s worked in a range of acute adult services, eating disorders services, and secure units. Currently, Ark practices as a Cognitive Behaviour Psychotherapist at the Priory Hospital, where he pursues his career passion for treating ailment of the modern world: depression, anxiety and stress.  In his established private practice, he devotes his time to working with individuals and couples.

Ark’s training in several psychotherapy modalities allows him to approach every client in a unique way, depending on their needs in treatment. As part of his integrative approach, he employs a variety of techniques, namely cognitive analysis and restructuring, behavioural analysis, role-play, empty chair and cathartic techniques, dream analysis and work, guided imagery, Socratic questioning, and addressing existential factors, body scan and mindfulness techniques.

He has practiced Mindfulness under guidance of several teachers for many years. At present he offers Mindfulness teaching and training in his practice. At the same time, he has received a training (Master of Arts) in Religious Studies. His studies provide him with knowledge about the intersection between mental health and religiosity and spirituality. This has become one of the areas that he specialises in.

Ark’s work follows the guidelines of the National Institute of Clinical Excellence to provide effective treatment interventions.

Ark’s Qualifications

  • BSc (hons) Religious Studies
  •  MA Religious Studies
  • Post Graduate Diploma in Psychology
  • MSc Clinical Psychology
  • MSc Cognitive Behavioural Psychotherapy
  • PGDip Gestalt Therapy
  • Diploma in Homeopathy
  • BABCP Accredited CBT psychotherapist
  • Graduate member of the British Psychological Society
  • Member of the British Association for Behavioural And Cognitive Psychotherapies
  • Member of the International Association for the Psychology of Religion

Kate Surgey is trained in Process-oriented Psychology, Transpersonal Psychotherapy and trained with the Holistic Healing College as a Spiritual Counsellor. She is also a trained Spiritual Healer with the SAGB and she creatively integrates and combines the essence and mysticism of many spiritual traditions and esoteric systems with cutting-edge spiritual interventions and practical, more conventional, psychotherapy techniques. She is as psychological and scientific as she is spiritual and values an intuitive approach grounded in professionalism and traditional psychotherapeutic approaches.

Her work explores the multi-dimensional nature of who we are and supports clients to move between different levels of reality; from everyday consciousness to the essence dimension. She hold a deep heartfelt compassionate witnessing and a boundless faith in people, potential and spirit.

Kate’s training has taken into studying the ancient Taoist practises of Martial Arts, Tai chi and Qi gong as well many other shamanic practises with various teachers. She specialises in working with family constellations and the influence of ancestral issues on the present day issues.

She has been an avid teacher for ten years of women’s empowerment, and her workshops and large womens’ programmes are very popular. She has been in practise for ten years in her spiritual counselling practise in South London. Her work has taken from her working in secure units with young offenders to the power of ancient and modern energy practises which she is a specialist in.

Kate’s work follows the guidelines of the UKCP to offer effective psychotherapeutic interventions from all.

Kate’s Qualifications

  • B.A. honours degree in English Literature
  • Psychotherapy Training in Process-Oriented Psychology 2009- 2017
  • Hypnotherapy & Regression with Holisitic Healing College 2007, including EFT, NLP, TAPAS, Matrix reprinting
  • Spiritual Counsellor & Life Coach with Holistic Healing College 2006-8
  • Psychosynthesis with The Psychosynthesis Trust, Teens & Toddlers 2012-1
  • Worldwork & Facilitating Leadership in Others with CFOR – Group Dynamics & Leadership 2009
  • Worldwork 2014 “Politics & Consciousness in the Changing World – New Solutions: from History to the Future 2014” 
  • Astrology Training with Dawn Bodrogi, Melanie Reinhart, Liz Greene, Ana Isabel, Chris Brennan
  • Earth Path Practitioner & Trainer since 2006
  • Spiritual Healer – The Spiritualist Association of Great Britain  2005 – 2009
  • Karmic Release & Spirit Release training with the Spirit Release Foundation 2009
  • Ancestral, Past Life & DNA Journeying 2012
  • HypnoBirthing the Mongan Method training with the Hypnobirthing Institute 2014
  • Eyebody – Brain, Eye, Body Coordination & Connection to Presence with Peter Grunwald
  • Qi gong, Tai chi & Martial Arts with Teacher Matt Ackroyd and the Mei Quan Academy since 2009
  • Dragon & Tiger Qi gong with Bruce Frantzis
  • Shamanic Pregnancy Training with Moonsong Jane Hardwicke Collings